I travel, I plant, I paint (mainly walls), I scoot, I tie dye, I write

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That’s what I imagine it says at least.

My first thoughts were ‘Luxembourg city is very beige,’ and that the high rises reminded me of the short film before Monty Python, The Meaning of Life, when the sky scrapers are fighting and sail off like a ship. As I finished writing this (in my notebook) we drove past an advert saying ‘follow me’ with John Cleese doing the ministry of silly walks. Spooky. It seems very 80s, the modern parts, but the rest, oh my God, stunning. We arrived at 5 ish, checked in to the hotel then headed into Luxembourg city for a wander.

Lesson learnt from today: I’m a shit passenger driver. I try with too much guilt behind me because I’m not driving, but have no knowledge of rules or roads in different countries.

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In true tradition of the past 3 days I’ve been writing down little things my boyfriend James says, so enjoy the wise words that made me laugh;

‘European. Wearing a scarf. Only rich Europeans wear scarfs.’

‘You don’t want to go to the populated areas – you want to go to the places like Bruges. Bruges is like Bromley, in the sense that Brussels is London.’

*Police on bikes dive past*
‘Even they have hand guns! It’s like drive by shooting.’
*Reenacts shooting while trying to hold onto handle bars*

‘Even the lampposts are posh!’
*Takes photo*

‘I want to catch a Pokemon in every country.’

‘Fuck travel guide and trip adviser! You can look at all the landmarks on Pokemon Go! Over there, look, a fire hydrant. I would never have known that if it wasn’t for Pokemon. Look, circles on a wall. We don’t need to travel now.’

‘Not every bad smell is me, Emily.’

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Me: ‘None of the books are English.’
James: ‘Look, the Oxford English dictionary. You could get that.’

‘If you were in charge we’d be absolutely fucked.’

Me: ‘They’ve got shower caps, James!’
James: ‘Told you it’s worth 60 quid.’

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A really English thing I’ve noticed in us is that we all pronounce towns or countries how we want to pronounce them no matter how they are actually said, and we continue to use the name like it is normal. We were pronouncing Liege as Lie-gee (we didn’t really try), but Google says it’s more like ledge. Yet we can’t help but say it our way.

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I finally understand why British people swarm to Irish pubs aboard. We found one called The Black Stuff and it feels like home. It’s day three still, we don’t need home, but still. Going out and relaxing to us English is a pub. We did find one in Luxembourg city actually but it was still very European and that is fine! Obviously you want that when you go away, you want to experience the culture. But if it’s programmed in you that a pub, where you ask for a pint not a small, medium or large, is where you relax then so be it. We like a British pub. Just like people from Luxembourg probably search for things they find familiar when they go abroad. If you go to a country and don’t see any British people, go to an Irish pub and they’re all there.

I’m impressed that it took 3 days to find one though. Not that we were looking but if you go to any Spanish country you’d find one just like that.

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